The Beauty of Anonymity/ What the hell was I thinking?

I'm in "what the hell was I thinking?" mode.

A few entries back, I blathered something to the effect a white guy's version of "keepin' it real". Of being dedicated to writing the blog as if no one were reading (insert hacky joke here), and being myself.

It's a catch-22. You want people to read, or why else write... but then I want to regulate who reads this foolish thing and whom they tell. Then I realize I did post the fucking link to the thing on my website... oops- should I really be swearing in here now...shit, I mean shoot...

So... I got a coupla flirty emails from someone I had met a while back. Okay, I know I jump around... I know I abuse the use of ellipses, but stay with me... I seem to think, speak and write stream-of-conscious-ly-ish... but anywho... ah, um...

...flirty emails, right. First off, I am so oblivious that people generally have to inform me that they are flirting with me. The news that someone has been flirting with me often comes in the form of a punch from another female friend who found it "obvious". By the way, I think "obvious" implies that everyone knows about it, especially the flirtee, but anyway I digress...

I tend to write something and immediately forget it. Which is nice in a way because I can read my own entries a week later and laugh at what a buffoon I am. Maybe I forget as part of an elaborate defense mechanism to keep my head from exploding when I stop and think about exactly what information I have put in the most public of forums.

So my acquaintance mentioned something from a previous post- the brutally honest personal post, and it hits me... this girl was recommended to the blog by my niece... so my niece reads the blog. My littlesweetinnocentadorablefantasticlittle niece, Natalie... reading blogs about her Uncle's private measurements. To quote the great Napoleon Dynamite, "IDIOT!"

Yikes, double yikes, and yikes once again.

Granted, my sweet little niece is closer to thirty then fourteen, but she's STILL my sweet little niece. I can only hope Janel (her younger sister) isn;t reading this foolish thing.

Natty-icksnay on the ogsblay.

I've really go to rethink this honesty thing. Some things are better left unsaid, er untyped.

The tickertape is beginning to roll through my skull... what have I writtten...what have I written... what have I written that's going to cost me a gig at a college or a conference. Hmmm... some of the conferences and conventions I perform at are of a spiritual nature (shocked as you may be) ... how are those folks going to enjoy the old "brutal honesty" entry?

Um... where else can I get into trouble???

I know I'm not that important, but I have visions of castigation at the hands of Tipper Gore and the FBI.

Okay, I have a little friend in Michigan that I have known about a year and a half, that, were she here, I would be dating instead of chatting with over the phone three times per week... hmmm... how is she going to enjoy the flirty email commentary...

I wonder what would happen if I poured my coffee into the keyboard... could I make this all go away!

One of the greatest attributes of blogs is anonymity.

This brings to mind a terrific website. People write their deepest confessions on a postcard and send them to this website, where they are published on the web, anonymously.

Check it out:

http://postsecret.blogspot.com/