Thursday, November 17, 2005

Johnny Cash Special

First off, I went to the dentist this morning, and it was perhaps the most painful experience of my life.

Oh, I didn't have dental surgery or anything, it was just a cleaning, but they had that horrendous "Rod Stewart butchers the classics" CD playing that has every dead standard singer from this century spinning in his grave.

I started begging for a root canal to distract the doctor just long enough to kick the cd player.

Now, the Johnny Cash special, tell me- was it any good?

The special FOR Johnny Cash, as CBS called it. While it might be for ca$h, (primarily that of CBS and the promoters behind the new biopic "Walk the Line" starring Jaquin Phoenix,) please don't tell me it's for Johnny, that's just insulting.

Cheryl Crow, Kid Rock, hmmm...

Kid Rock? Cheryl Crow? What, were Fifty cent and Avril Lavine already booked? How about a gritty Jessica Simpson version "24 Minutes to go"? I'm not sure I want to live another day if I can't hear John Mayer sing "Ring of Fire", mostly because I feel like my head is ON fire as the very thought.

Now I'm not saying I believe in heaven and hell in the traditional sense. NOR am I saying that Johnny Cash was a bad person, or in any way implying that he belongs in hell. I truly respect and admire the man. What I am saying is that IF Johnny is in hell, they were most definitely piping this special directly into his cell.


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